ARTEMIS FOWL

ARTEMIS FOWL 

Now that you have reviewed the case file [of young "criminal mastermind" Artemis Fowl], you must realize what a dangerous creature this Fowl is.

There is a tendency to romanticize Artemis...

He kept the existence of the [Nazi underground] People quiet only so that he could continue to exploit them over the years, which he did on several occasions. His one mistake was leaving Captain [Ms. Holly] Short alive. [Ms.] Holly became the LEP's foremost expert in the Artemis Fowl cases, and was invaluable in the fight against the [underground] People's most feared enemy. This fight was to continue across several decades. 

Ironically, the greatest triumph for both protagonists [Artemis Fowl and Ms. Holly Short] was the time they were forced to cooperate during the goblin insurgence. But that's another story.

Report compiled by: Doctor J. Argon, B. Psych, for the LEP Academy files.

Details are 94 per cent accurate, 6 per cent unavoidable extrapolation [guessing].

BRIEF ENCOUNTERS WITH ... ARTEMIS FOWL 

Artemis is impossible. Everytime we set up an interview he doesn't show. I think he enjoys standing me up. It's his idea of a joke. I get the message, of course. The message is that I am nothing more than his lackey, there to answer his call like a little lap dog. Artemis believes that I wouldn't even have a career if it wasn't for him. Well, I've got news for you, Master Fowl. [यानि अभिमान অভিমান] I was a successful writer [in my previous incarnations] before you came along - I had sold dozens of books and won two certificates of merit. Maybe I lied a bit about my age for the second certificate, but that's not the point. The point is that I don't need you, Artemis Fowl. [Very sad, very tragic.] There are loads of things I could write about. I have an idea about a girl who discovers a door in her... toybox that leads into a world [reminds Me of Alice in Wonderland] ruled by an ice princess. I'm sure that would be a mega bestseller. [My best wishes to Mega Bestseller.] 

***

If Internet rumours are to be believed, twelve-year-old Artemis Fowl is responsible for every major crime of the new century. [Satan and gang of Nazis responsible.] In this, the story of Artemis's first encounter with the [underground] fairy people [male and female Nazis], you'll find out how the criminal mastermind hatched a plot to restore his family's fortune - and how he discovered a world below ground of armed and dangerous fairies and mind-blowing technology [mind-blowing? pathetic]. 

And you'll learn how, by kidnapping Captain [Ms] Holly Short of the Lower Elements Police [LEP], Artemis Fowl almost triggered a cross-species war ... [Nazis have kidnapped and raped females for billions of years. But not My cup of tea. Beneath My dignity.]

(Excerpts from Eoin Colfer: ARTEMIS FOWL. Eoin is pronounced Owen.)

'Fast-paced, tongue-in-cheek, with some laugh-out-loud jokes. Smart and page-turning' - Sunday Times 

Kishalay Sinha [G]